It was amazing, and yet slightly odd at the same time - my body was sure it was winter (the 2 week period at the start of the holidays when I began storing food for hibernation may have had something to do with that) and yet there I was, in my bikini, sunbathing in 40 degree heat. Like I said, odd.
I was over there for New Year's eve, and spent the night in ridiculously cool surroundings, looking out over a pretty spectacular view of Cape Town. It was one of those nights that makes you feel happy to be alive and a bit sentimental, and I decided right there and then that 2011 would be no ordinary year for me. It was to be the year I would do what I wanted, when I wanted; I would make things happen for myself, and in return good things would come my way. Whilst I cannot take the praise for this phrase, 'just wing it' was adopted as my new mantra. In a year which will no doubt be a rocky one, with the end of university and the start of something very much unknown in sight, this phrase seems the perfect antidote to all of those worries and apprehensions bumbling around my brain.
Just wing it; essentially, don't think it over, just do it - go for it, engage, live it, be brave. Some may say it's radical (not many will), I will say it's necessary if I am going to survive this year. However, this mantra is not just about making it through the more challenging times ahead but also about being able to appreciate the here and now - the home stretch, here in the safety net that is university. I want to be able to look back on this final chapter without a single regret or doubt obstructing my view.
As long as I endeavor to do the things that make me happy and content, this will be the case. Don't most people always do the things that make them happy and content, you ask? Well, yes, but most people are not me...I have a tendency to do things because others think I should; because I can't say 'no' to people very easily; because I hate to feel like I've let someone down; because my ego likes a good boost from time to time and if someone wants me to choreograph a dance piece for them because they have noticed I am quite good at that then that's quite nice really, isn't it? So I do the dance piece and it is fine, but it's not something I particularly wanted my tuesday and friday nights to be taken up by. This term there will be none of that; there will be no dance pieces founded in obligation or flattery - there will just be activities chosen by me, for me, and that is that.
Since coming home from SA I have felt unusually high-spirited; I am content and happy with life for the most part. Maybe it is the effect of the African sun; the excitement of being tanned amongst a sea of pale Britons? Or is it perhaps my new mantra? I have been busy since being back on home soil, as is the norm, but busy doing things I actually want to do, not things I feel I should be doing for someone else's sake (or for the sake of my C.V.) and it is this, I believe, that has brought this eternal sunshine into my life.
This may be the year I actually stick to my new year's resolution - I think I shall be 'winging it' for a while longer yet.
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