...something bigger and better

It's funny how you imagine your life will pan out when you're young. When I was 9 or 10 I remember watching a documentary on Britney Spears; She was a 17 year old girl, who was massively famous with a no. 1 already under her belt. That will be me, I thought. I was 10, so I worked out I had 7 years to get to where she was (maths was a strong point of mine). Plenty of time!

At 13, I was still a regular girl from Newcastle, with that dream of being famous at 17. I hadn't given up hope at this point though - I still had 4 years yet!! No need to worry.

I'm now 21, and you might not have guessed, but I am not famous. I am not known the world over for my singing ability, or my acting skill. I do not have millions of fans screaming my name, and aspiring to be like me. Thing is, when I hit 17, and realised that my life hadn't gone the way I thought it might, it was a bit of a blow, but I knew I was still young; I didn't give up that dream of becoming successful because by then it had manifested itself into something more. I was now at the point where it was an ambition to be an actor - gone were the days when I just wanted to have the Britney Spears lifestyle, this was serious now.

The fact I was still a nobody though was also serious. And at 21, it is even more so than ever.

I have three close friends who all graduated at the start of the summer, and only one has got a job and is working now. I have other friends who, like me, have another year of study left, but ultimately are at a bit of a loss as to what will happen when this year is up. Then, I have friends who seem to have it sorted. These are the people I hate. The people who stress me out without knowingly doing so. The ones who when you ask what their plan is going to be, can succinctly tell you what they will be doing this time next year. More often than not, these people don't actually know for sure that their plan will run it's course, however they have done so much leg work already, its seems almost inevitable that it will.

At 21, my aspirations have altered slightly. My dream now is not simply to become a successful actor; I am very interested in television and radio, and the presenting side of things. Even writing has much more of an appeal than I ever thought it would. Yet, I know there are so many other people out there with similar aspirations, and I know one of these people.

This person, lets call them Jo, wants to go down a similar path to me. Jo also falls into the category of one of those people who unknowingly worries me. Jo has already got masses of experience. There's the amateur radio show, the impressive following of media professionals and music industry buffs on twitter, the blog, the work experience with big media companies - the list goes on. How can I compete with someone like this? Why did I not start years ago, and build up this back catalogue of resources and experience?

It has gotten to the time in our lives where we need to be pro-active, for our own sakes. For me, for my friends who have graduated, and for those who have no idea which way they are going in life, this is make or break time. It pains me to say it, but it's true.

All we want to do really is rely on our parents, have fun, have money, and have things sorted out by the magic elf who comes to all adults and turns their lives into something resembling a respectable job and lifestyle (there is no magic elf, but who told us? nobody, that's who). This is the time in our life when things change, and it is no longer possible to go from day to day knowing your parents will take care of things, or to think its ok to meet your mates in town every other day for a Starbucks and a quick shop around Topshop for a new outfit for the following night out.

We have to be responsible, pro-active, productive, have energy and drive, and start to make things happen. Otherwise we will never be bigger and better. I should have started all this a while ago and I am sorry I didn't.

Jo, I hate you yet simultaneously, you are my role model (sorry Britney, times have changed). Its time to stop messing around and go for whatever it is I, and you, want to do. Don't panic, don't be scared, just take it one step at a time, and make sure you know your direction.

Things can happen, but, frustratingly, only we can make them happen. Ain't life a bitch?!